While driving to work, I realized advocacy is needed everyday and everywhere. It does not matter how old you are, if you are perfectly settled in a great school, there will be an unexpected event throughout your lifetime. Actually, it will continue to happen throughout your lifetime. When I was growing up, I lived in a perfect bubble. It was not a perfect bubble for my parents. Growing up in 1980s to 2000s, we did not have many resources like today, we did not have social media, no websites with current information, YouTube videos, bloggers, and other ways. Our way was rather old fashioned which was to drive to seek resources. Luckily, my senior year in high school on my IEP was advocacy knowledge. My teacher of the deaf educated me on my rights for the real world. There was a huge gap between early childhood setting to real world setting.
Honestly, it was frightening. I faced a bad experience at vocational rehabilitation services when I was 18 trying to get college financial support. “What do you want to be when you grow up?” I knew I wanted to work with deaf children and guide families. The counselor rejected the idea. I also had passion in designing, he rejected the idea. Few months of rejections. I did not get the help after all. I have faced discrimination by companies during interviews, a lady who was thrilled to see me and loved my resume, but she tossed the papers as soon as I told her I have a hearing loss. I did ballet, jazz, hip hop, gymnastics, cheerleading, basketball, flute,and volleyball. It was a beautiful ride! However, I was stopped by a referee at a intense basketball game, my skin was flushed. He stopped me because of my hearing aids. The coach and my parents fought for me.The crowd roared. I resumed playing. I was in high school, I faced some difficulties- movies with no subtitles and tests where I had to listened in regular academic classes.
I had anxiety.
My teacher of the Deaf fought for my rights and accommodations.
I have been advocating since my childhood for education and extracurricular activities in the real world. I found myself advocating as a mother. I advocate for my daughter, her needs and situations. She is at the age where I cannot fully advocate for her, but with my experiences, I guide her and tell her to grow through things instead of go through it. (My favorite quote: "Grow through what you go through".) There are boundaries. I guide her in what is appropriate and what is not- social communication , social media- I removed the apps- actually she removed them herself. I also advocate as single mother and as deaf.
It is everyday and everywhere.
Advocating is not only fighting for what you believe in, your rights, but it is also asking for proper help for your needs.
Be loyal to yourself, do not let others put you down.
Recently, I woke up from a dream where a lady did not want me to talk because of my speech and did not want me to proceed. It was weird, I have been at same job for the last six years and I call it a home. Maybe it was a sign, a friendly reminder on advocacy that I need to share with you guys.
It does not matter how old you are, how old your child is, where you are at- continue to advocate, be consistent, educate yourself along the way, teach your children not to give up and prepare them. My mother delivered me, she saw me take first breath and wept when she was told that her daughter is deaf at age ten months. She continues to guide me, remind me to use my backbone, and remind me that I am worthy.She will continue to walk besides me on advocacy until her last breath while my daughter will walk besides me on the other side to learn on advocacy while I can mentor her and remind her that she is worthy not to let others put her down and advocate for herself.
Hearing Impaired single mother and teacher aide at a hearing impaired oral preschool program. An author of "Turn The Lights On, I Cant Hear You".