Christmas was wonderful to my family and me. We all went to church together and from party to party. My calendar was looking like a tornado with all the titles of events. At the parties, I now am quiet and calmer. While growing up, sitting in a large room with the family and relatives conversations overlapping and volume of voices increasing while the lighting of the room dimming due to Christmas lights and fireplace lighting up and crackling sounds. As a teenager, I secretly panicked and was overwhelmed but I kept smiling. Mostly, I sat next to my grandmother Rose throughout the years during Christmas parties and we squeezed each others hands by signaling each other “They are crazy” “What was that?” “You doing okay?” and winked at each other.
Over the years and especially the past few years, things are different with our family. My grandma passed away a few years ago. I learned to mediate and stay quiet. Now I have my active daughter, I have to stay calm before I go cucko koo crazy and mark her memories of crazy mother going crazy. I did not want her to grow up remembering that. This Christmas, I was very calm and quiet because of so many commitments and to attend events. I sat on the floor thinking of my childhood memories growing up in Vermont and having years of “White Christmas” with my family, especially my grandmother. She was truly the light of my life and my vision and hearing. She was my device to the world.
This Christmas morning, we all were finished opening up presents except one big present that was for “The Family”. She was opening it and thinking it was for my 11.5 years old dog, Gucci. Dog toys then eventually Dog Training book. “I get it. You want me to train Gucci.” She still did not get it! My mother announced that we had an appointment to see the puppies because we are getting a new puppy. My daughter squealed! Then quickly she cried in tears of happiness!
My father, daughter and I went to see the puppies. She was in heaven and did not want to leave. We are picking up our new member on Saturday! Magical Christmas of love and sounds. We have named our new Labradoodle, Holly- Holly Holland. I like the sound of that.
We hope you all had a nice Christmas!
Do it Scared.
Love More, Worry Less.
Be open to new possibilities.
Hearing Impaired single mother and teacher aide at a hearing impaired oral preschool program. An author of "Turn The Lights On, I Cant Hear You".